I am tired. My body,mind, emotional part, and spirit are weary. I am not going to get into specifics....

Have you ever forgiven someone, but still hurt by it. Actions do echo. It is like if someone shot you with a gun in the arm and you somehow forgave that but your arm still hurt. This is how I felt yesterday. Then something happened. Don't ask me what, but somehow I let it go and stopped focusing on myself so much and it doesn't really hurt anymore. I mean I can reinact the whole thing in my mind and relive the hurt, but it really isn't there now. NOt that it happens or should happen like that for everyone, but for me it did.

I think it is easier to forgive someone for hurting you then it is for them to forgive themselves sometimes. Espcecially someone you love. I remember one time I was watching a friends baby and we had an accident of sorts. The baby was fine...crying a little but no bruises or cuts or anything. The parents were like well she looks fine, it is ok, but man I broke down and was so upset because I almost hurt there baby. Luckily the kid is fine and life goes on...but you know what i mean. God desires forgiveness. Of eachother, of one's self, and from Him. Guilt is not of GOd. When you are in the middle of it though it is just hard to forgive yourself of somethings. I think we all have something. If satan can attack you at that place man he can do some serious damage. What is the answer? I guess trusting that God loves you no matter what. People you fail but nothing changes how God adores you! NOTHING! He doesn't want you to own that guilt. He wants you to hand it to him and trust him with your heart. He wants you to confess and start living the abundant life he promises! He wants good things for you not bondage. Allow yourself to be free. It feels good and it is ok to feel good.

I am just rambling. I hope I made sense.