Expectations

I wish I was as wise as I want to be or as my friends and family need me to be. I just screw up at times and more importantly I hurt people I love when I don't meet there expectation of me to always come thru in the way they would like. I may not always do what people think is best, but I do love people...a lot. Every thing I do is with the motive of what someone needs. Sometimes in the process I don't think about what someone else may need. To my friends and all that I hold dear please know I am trying. I am sorry that I hurt you at times, but I am trying. Those who I may have hurt may not believe that but it is true. It is only by God's saving grace thru Jesus Christ my Lord that I can do anything good. Jesus, please give me wisdom to do and say the things you would have of me. Help me be a better friend and servant of YOU. Amen.

Gay: yeah or neah

So today was election day. This is good,right? I studied up on what was on the ballet, made some somewhat informed decisions and I went to the polls. I voted for the amendment. But later as I was thinking about it more and recounting a conversation I had with my pastor, I really wished I would have left it blank. Why? You ask... Well as I watched the news and saw 'us' and 'them' gathering in to different places I just cried. It felt so wrong. It felt like this was not about what it seemed to be about. Satan is so sneaky. Marriage is good,yes! But love is the base for all that we do and are and although we think we are right sometimes we are fighting the wrong battle. Today's election was not about the sanctity of marriage. It was about fear. If we are concerned with marriage and keeping it sacred and what is best for our children then lets battle no fault divorce. If we want to make a difference in families why not create ways for couples to receive free counseling both before marriage and during a conflict. It is our duty as Christians (those of you who are) to pray and fight the battles that God leads you to. Some said that today's vote was a victory for God.... Was it? I don't know, maybe, but if so it was tiny. There are better battles to be in. We must never forget that love is always the HIGH road.

Well that was just some thoughts as I end my day. Maybe now I can sleep.

Journey

So my friends are in China on a journey to get there daughter. Those were her words. It means so much. I mean they are traveling and yet once they get her, on gotcha day, the journey continues. What about my journey? It is hard to see the stops along the way and even harder to picture the end destiny. For months my friends have been preparing and anticipating this single moment in time. How amazing it will be to be united with the promised child? If only I could be so focused on the stops in my life...How much more joy would I experience if I was looking ahead and anticipating what God was doing. It is much more then just not being disciplined it is me allowing myself to be complacant. It makes me ill to admitt it, but it doesn't change the truth. I don't have to own this guilt;that is not what my savior would want of me. I must press on and overcome, accept His forgiveness, and start again with the hope of glory on my side, in my heart, and as my ever present guide in this jouney that will one day be complete for His sake and His glory.

Peace and Hope